I thought on whether or not I wanted to write a blog post about the end of the year. The concept of new year’s resolutions seem somewhat formulaic and cliche. They also carry the idea that they are well meaning plans that never quite taxi down the runway and take flight. Gym membership in January, back on the couch by February. That sort of thing.

For me, I tend to look more toward the past on New Year’s Eve than anywhere else.

2016, as I’ve written about during its course and a post specifically reviewing what of the year I had experienced, was pretty momentous for me on a personal level.

The mad quest of self improvement and actualization that started in 2015 truly came into its own for me last year. And while I didn’t hit all the checkboxes I wanted to and I didn’t do as much as I feel I could have, I think I am a better person at the start of 2017 than I was at the start of 2016. Which is pretty neat, all considered.

When I think about what were the key lessons I’ve learned from 2016 I can think of two separate ideas; one I can take credit for, another is one I found in a book that really spoke to me.

In a book I read, the notion of thoughts, actions, and character was illuminated for me in a way I hadn’t theorized before. What someone does becomes who someone is. Their actions become their character. No action can be taken without first thinking about it to some extent. In that, your mind is the most important and impactful thing in your life.

If you want to become a famous author, but your thoughts all revolve around avoiding putting the proverbial pen to paper your dream never becomes a reality. And while it might be easy to blame other elements, at the end of the day your thoughts have a huge and pivotal part to play.

I’m not explaining it nearly as well as the book did, but it’s the idea that the thoughts you place emphasis on will ultimately guide your actions and your character. If I need to do dishes, there’s going to be part of me that wants to be lazy as Hell and not do them. Another part of me wants to keep my house clean and not let chores pile up. I want my character, who I am, to be someone that takes care of what he has and keeps up with himself and his responsibilities. To make that a reality, I have to water the seeds of thoughts that work toward that end. So the act of my cleaning the dishes becomes an almost autonomous effort of my thoughts working towards my character.

Again, I’m probably not explaining it very well, but that’s the idea. I’ve spent a lot of 2016 thinking about the first portion of that process; thought. Trying to adjust my viewpoint, how I look at the world and the people around me. How I look at myself. And while I’ll always have to work to do on that front, the efforts so far can be used towards shifting my actions. Acting on the thoughts that work toward my intended character will be a strong theme of 2017 for me.

The second idea is a bit nebulous, but it revolves around humility and equality. 2016 had a lot of celebrity deaths. For me, it had a very important personal death as well. But it wasn’t until I watched Rogue One and Carrie Fisher passed away did a light bulb of sorts shine brightly in my mind.

Slow and steady is the march of time. The 4th dimension (time) is ever moving forward. And we’re only along for but a portion of its ride. To lose someone you know on a personal level is devastating. Someone you’re close to, who was there for you through huge parts of your life. I can’t imagine a worse pain than that.

I thought on why Carrie Fisher’s passing had such a resonating impact on people, even myself and realized that it’s a shattering of perception and a return to reality.

For many people, Star Wars is forever. The original trilogy is a near-perfectly crafted adventure that taught young viewers the idea of heroism, adventure, bonding through circumstance, morality, and redemption. These iconic stories and characters are forever ingrained the psyche and fabric of popular culture.

Even though we all knew that Carrie Fisher is a human being, like everyone else, and would pass away someday, to have it happen so suddenly is a shock to the senses. The next time you look at Princess Leia laying down cover fire with a blaster you’ll be reminded of Carrie Fisher and how her youthful vibrance and beauty was immortalized on film and in a story. But that moment in time has passed. Like her, we all will grow older some day. We’re not always going to be here.

I’ve been watching Star Wars Rebels lately, and the main characters in that story are all compelling and protagonists in every sense of the word. Like Han Solo or any other charismatic icon in a story, you want these characters to succeed and live on forever. To never get old. You don’t want to think of them as people with a finite measure of time to be alive, young, and the center of attention.

But the Star Wars franchise is now becoming that sobering reminder. By virtue of the timeline alone, the characters in Rebels are either old or gone by the time Episode 7 comes around. We’re starting to see the span of time in something that was once timeless. It’s the double edged sword of not leaving a story alone. Only comic books have managed to effectively freeze time where Batman’s been looming over Gotham for 70 something years. But with the advent of superhero movies coming out, sooner or later the realization of time will make its way there, also.

At first, I found this notion to be pretty distressing. When you’re a teenager or in your 20s you don’t think about this kind of stuff. You’ll always be young. Even in my 30s part of me feels ignorant to the march of time. But then I’ll play a game with someone literally half my age and think, “Damn. You didn’t even exist when I was going through things that shaped who I am today. You weren’t even alive when I was growing up.” It’s an interesting realization to make.

But I find it to be more invigorating than anything else now. We are here. Right now. Alive and (hopefully) well. But knowing that we won’t be isn’t something to be sad about it. It’s something we can celebrate right now. We can make the most of times now, whether they feel good or bad within their own echo chamber, because we will not be here forever. We can appreciate the things and people in our lives. We can stop taking them for granted, because we’re not blinded by the notion of forever.

And that can be a very empowering thing, in my opinion.

Tomorrow is not promised to anyone. Not our friends. Our family. Our idols. Our celebrities. Our actions, adventures, and legacies can be immortalized through Facebook, Twitter, or in the hearts of those around us but we ourselves are only here for but a short moment.

So make each day a thing. Each and every day. Even if you’re just going to be a lazy couch potato on a day, appreciate that day. Look around and consider how we won’t always get to do this.

My resolution is to stop throwing days away. To start appreciating them for the gifts they are.

It’s really easy to become absorbed and immersed in the emotional perils of our lives. We don’t have the job we want. We’re not in a relationship. We don’t have a million dollars in our bank account.

But you know what? You’re fucking alive. And you have people in your life that care about you. You have things to appreciate. They’re there. You have a lot to be happy about, and focusing on what you feel you don’t have is just robbing you of time with the things you have.

Do me a favor. Watch the end credits to Predator. This movie came out in 1987. Now? Thirty years ago. Look at how young the cast is. How full of life and in a natural context they are. I don’t think it’d be too much of a stretch for one of the cast members today to look back on that and think, “Damn. I was so young. I remember that. Being there. I should have really appreciated that time more. I probably could have done more. Not worried so much about shit I can hardly remember now. Damn.”

I don’t want to have that sense of regret and longing. I want to look at myself as though I was 62 looking back on 32 year old me now and appreciate life through that perspective.

An interesting paradox that seems easy to grasp but is something I’m sure a lot of people fail to act on is that experience comes with time. We could learn a lot from our elders, but as teenagers and young adults we think we have the whole world figured out. By the time we kinda do figure it out, we’re probably much older than we were when we thought we had it all down and there’s that sense of ‘Damn. If only I had this perspective back then’.

Well you can. It’s called listening to your elders. Asking them questions. Your grandparents weren’t born 50+ years old made specifically to act as another parental figure in your life. They were your age and they dealt with a lot of the same emotional things you did.

Life is a test and there are study guides, cheat sheets, and sources of research all around us that we fail to utilize until we become one of them.

I don’t know. This has gone off on a tangent I’m sure, but the idea that the present matters is something that is becoming more and more important to me.

Happy New Year, whoever takes the time to read this. Let’s make 2017 a good year and a start to better ones ahead.